Monday, April 14, 2008

Update

Okay, I'm on a typical-April "overly dramatic" roll today. Let me continue:
  • Perhaps my biological clock is ticking. Subconciously my body says it's baby time and therefore I'm dreaming about settling down. Couple that with a killer backache that forced me to down 2 tylenol, an Advil and a Melatonin pill last night before bed and boom...this damn dream that is ruining my day.
  • Maybe I should join an online dating service. Except all of those about me forms and selling yourself freak me out.
  • On second thought...not for me.
  • Church. People find husbands in church all of the time. Churches even have those singles groups!
  • Oh yeah, except I'm not into the evangelical thing and could never marry a Republican.
  • Polygamy?
  • Nah, probably falls into the evangelical Republican category. And I'm not into prairie dress.
  • How about a singles ad? "Single White Female, highly neurotic, likes to tell her business on the internet and really just wants babies..."
  • I'm guessing that might not go over well either.
  • I started reading marriage profiles on "The Knot". If you aren't familiar, the couple tells their how they met story, the engagement story, the wedding details and links to their registry.
  • I sobbed.
  • For a half hour.
  • Ugly crying I tell you.
  • And then I ate half a box of grasshopper cookies.
  • Yeah, get fatter, that'll really make me an attractive marriage prospect.
  • So then I bought another pair of flip flops online.
  • And I felt better.

So yeah. This was cathartic.

Haha, and all the married folk just turned to themselves and said, "Man, I'm glad I'm not single."

;)

6 comments:

kate said...

i have a secret confession that i hope is safe on here because i don't know if anyone i knows reads this - but i totally did the online dating thing after my last breakup! shhh!! :$ hahaha

it was actually kind of fun...if nothing else, it's a self-esteem booster to get macked on by guys (however questionable some of them may be).

i actually did end up meeting someone on there in real life and we dated for awhile, but then...blah blah blah i'm an idiot and fuxed it up etc etc (not sure that part is all that interesting lol). anyway, while things were still great between me and internet dude, i did worry how i'd explain to people how we met if they asked...we came up with some big lie about meeting at work, lol

ANYWAY.

what i am getting to here in this mile-long comment is that you might have fun signing up for something like that, just to get a little self-esteem boost and also potentially meet someone.

and if you do find some magic formula to meet fantastic dudes, please share! because clearly the only thing i am good at is making bad choices...ha.

p.s. i ate a bag of flaming hot cheetos last night while i was despairing about relationship suckiness, and that is way more disgusting than grasshoppers, so you should not feel bad at all! haha

kate said...

oh my god that is like 4 pages long...my apologies!

April said...

Don't apologize!

I actually know several couples who met online and are now married and happy and everything is wonderful. But ugh, those about me things are so hard! lol

I dunno, I might try. You've given me a little hope about them, it could be fun.

And flaming hot cheetos? Sounds so much better than grasshoppers right now! LOL

kate said...

i would give you some cheetos but sadly enough they are all gone :'( hahah

i did it on match.com because it's free...just be yourself in the description thing...idk apparently guys on there were all over the awkward/nerdy type (lucky for me, hahaha)

SassyCassie said...

Alex's brother met his wife on match. com. I think the most important thing in those "about me" things is to be honest about who you are.

I LOVED the knot and now I love the nest! And I'm always over on the message boards at soulcysters crying about my stupid ovaries.

kate said...

cassie - thanks for the soulcysters link! i have pcos and i had no idea there was a community like this...whoa